


INTERLUDE BY A WHEELBARROW

by OneforAll



Series: Musketeers A/U [1]
Category: The Musketeers (2014)
Genre: Implied Sexual Content, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-26
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-06 07:52:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4213878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneforAll/pseuds/OneforAll
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A lighthearted snippet from the end of D'Artagnan's stag night, from my slight A/U.</p>
            </blockquote>





	INTERLUDE BY A WHEELBARROW

**Author's Note:**

> This is a lighthearted look at the end of D'Artagnan's stag night, from my A/U that veers off from Series 2 after A Prodigal Father, where Rochefort is dealt with by different means and Marguerite and Lemay don't die. Athos and Aramis have been a couple since Through A Glass Darkly. More serious works, and the rest of this, will follow soon!

Interlude By A Wheelbarrow

"Mon cher?"

"Hmm?"

"What shall we do with this barrow--when we are finished with it?"

"Take it back In the morning."

"Isn't that..theft?"

"Technically, it's borrowing, Or you could call it a short term military requisition--to transport a temporarily incapacitated member of the King's musketeers!"

"Oh, darling, you're so clever--that's why you're going to be Captain! Yes....bless him, he is, isn't he? Incapacitated! See, I'm still sober--I can say long words!"

"Wellc..yes. However I would say that unconscious in a wheelbarrow defintely qualifies D'Artagnan as incapacitated."

"Yes--just as a good bachelor night should end! And we, his supporters, are still supporting him!"

"In a manner of speaking..."

"Well, you're still upstanding--though aren't you always? And I'm still standing--and pushing this wheelbarrow!"

"You ..are still standing because you are pushing the wheelbarrow--and I am behind you! Swaying..might be a better way to put it..."

"But I am still standing! And capable of doing,,,,more! And, look--Porthos is still standing too!"

"Er, again, sweetheart, strictly speaking, Porthos is leaning, Heavily, against that wall, As though he has fallen in love with it!"

"Ah yes...I see, Our dear Porthos! Always a trooper. He is not quite vertical, But he is not quite..horiz..hor.. on the ground. Now..you..My lord..are speaking very strictly tonight...Do you not want to lean against a wall with me..in that nice dark corner over there..and be strict and..upstanding?"

"Well, that is tempting..very..but not yet."

"Why?"

"Because I fear the Wrath."

"Wrath?"

"The Wrath of Constance. Far more than the wrath of Richlieu or Rochefort. If I do not get her bridegroom home in one piece as promised."

"Ah, well it would be ungallant to disappoint a lady! But can I not have just one kiss? I have not been able to kiss you for at least five hours and that is entirely too long!"

"Well, I agree on that. Just a moment..Porthos...PORTHOS!"

""Aw -Awright, no need to ROAR at me. Makes my head hurt!"

"So--you are alive?"

"I am, Just..resting..."

"Can you do something for me?"

"Whaddya need-Captain?"

"Not Captain yet, my friend."

"Jus'...practising!"

"Can you guard this groom and barrow?"

"Guard? Yeah, I can do that--do a lot of that. What barrow?" Ah, I see, good idea! Did we nick it?"

"We...appropriated it."

"Aah..good word, that! Hello, 'Mis! Y'know, Athos is the only one can say long words when he's drunk?"

"I know, He has ...many talents!"

"Oh, look at him. Our little brother, spark out! Bless! D'you think we gave him a good bachelor night?"

"I hope his poor head thinks so tomorrow!"

"Athos...is that you? Where are we?"

"Ah, life stirs in the barrow! We're on our way home, my very drunk young friend."

"Did I have a good bachelor night?"

"Well, since we are pushing you home in a wheelbarrow at three in the morning, I would say tradition had been satisfied."

"Oh..wheelbarrow? Thas good, because I think my legs stopped working...Where'd we get the barrow?

"It was a ..military requi--requisi--Athos borrowed it!"

"Hello 'Mis! Athos..always looks after us, doesn’t he?"

"Completely!"

"Athos--if I had a hat--would take it off to you!"

"You've never had a hat--why is that?"

"'Cause when I saw the way you way yours..knew... could never do it so well. So decided not to try!"

"That may just be the strangest compliment I've ever received. Ah..life in the barrow is dormant again. Porthos--can you watch him for a while?"

"Course I can--wooh! Can I kneel and watch 'im?"

"Kneeling sounds like a good idea. Aramis and I need a quick..private conference.."

"Oh..yeah! Good bit of wall back there! He he..can't get enough, can you, 'Mis...?

"Porthos..is tha' you?"

"Sure is, little brother. You still alive?"

"Think so! Porthos, I love you...'m getting married, y'know..."

"Yes, I know...but not to me.."-

"I KNOW that! Not that drunk...I love my Constance..an' I love my brothers....We're the Insepabl--the Insep--we stick together!"

"We surely do! Can I rest my head on your barrow?"

"Course you can. But I think its Athos', not mine. He won't mind! Where are he and 'Mis?"

"Having a private "talk". In the alley.."

"Aah..the usual. They should be able to get married too..."

"Baby brother, they may as well be...Think they're still on the honeymoon...Anyway not sure we could survive another bachelor night just yet!


End file.
